Sometimes, I Get It Right
March 2, 2009 Sometimes I get it right. I actually do. But you know the drill: Blind hog. Acorn. Even a broken clock is right twice a day. Right?
Anyway. I have been wondering out loud for some time about how long it would take for the world to sit up and take notice of our insatiable thirst for corn-based ethanol. But first you have to understand that 80% of America’s corn production is consumed domestically, which means we have very little, if any, impact on the global price of cornbread.
I knew criticism was coming and it’s only fitting that U.S. corn should feel some of the world’s relentless condemnation U.S. cotton faces every single day. I knew somebody, somewhere was going to put us smack in the middle of the gas-versus-grits debate. But my surprise was how quickly it came. As far as I can tell, the first world leader to weigh in publicly was none other than that great humanist Fidel Castro. Castro says President Bush’s support for using our own corn and soybeans for alternative fuel production is depleting food stocks in developing countries. He claims we are putting the lives of 3 billion people at risk.
Alright, let’s look at Cuba for a moment. I don’t smoke, so I will have to take your word for it if you say Cuban Cohibas are the finest cigars in the world. But it seems to me that if a “developing” country such as Cuba is facing a food shortage, maybe someone should take a look at how Cuba’s very limited agricultural acres are used. If you are short food, why not grow food? It ain’t rocket surgery: Cuba has a choice of eating cigars or cornflakes (The sarcasm switch is set to “on.”) But seriously, it’s Comrade Castro’s call, and Castro is an honorable man.
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I read in the paper where barley acres are being replaced by corn. And I don’t have to tell you what a barley shortage will cause, right? The price of beer might explode. I just hope corn doesn’t displace hops (what is a hop?) or we will be doubly slammed.
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This month we start a new feature called “Drew’s Half Acre.” Associate editor Drew Harris and his family own farm land a stone’s throw from our offices, and Drew thought it would be great fun as well as educational to raise a half acre of hops (not really, it’ll be cotton) and chronicle his exploits every month. I won’t spoil the fun by telling you who the industry types are that are lining up to help Drew with his ambitions. That’ll come in future installments.
I can’t wait to watch Drew try to fix a broken-down tractor in 100-degree heat on a Saturday at sunset. That will be me over there in the shade, laughing like a hyena and drinking a cold, but very expensive beer. (I guess that sarcasm switch is just stuck to “on.”) Join Drew for the ride.
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