Mama Made Me

My Mama made me wear this.

That was my excuse when she sent me off to a birthday party dressed in short pants and a dress shirt. I don’t remember how old I was, but back then boys didn’t wear short pants outside the swimming pool fence. Since then, that thinking has changed – much for the better.

Another thing Mama did was buy me denim jeans and polo shirts. We had no idea this was a definitively traditional look, it was just jeans and polos were standard stock at Goldberg’s Department Store in Belzoni, Mis’sippi. Whether I recognized it or not back then, I can thank Joe and Alvin Goldberg for shoving me down the road of timeless fashion. Joe and Alvin were ahead of their time, I say with a certain amount of reverence. I, on the other hand, became the clueless Beau Brummell.

I don’t normally read fashion reviews, mainly because my wardrobe never changes. But the word “denim” kept jumping out at me as I flipped through the pages of some magazines recently. With that in mind, here are some spring-fashion dos and don’ts for both men and women from the experts:

Do: It’s all about colored denim, and yellow is the hottest color thing this spring. – Devine Mafa, Divine Rags.

Don’t: When purchasing jeans, leave the acid, stone and other artificial washes to the good people of Eastern Europe. – Esquire Magazine.

Do: Lacoste polo shirts. – Esquire Magazine.

Don’t: The man who imparts opinions via t-shirt has neither the intelligence to form a cogent opinion, nor the good sense to keep it to himself. – Esquire Magazine.

Do: For men, jeans are always on-trend. – Jeremy Baer, Baer’s Den.

Don’t: Hemp clothes are great. If you want to smoke them. – Esquire Magazine.

Do: Anything in yellow from accessories to dresses, jackets or tops is perfect for spring. – Cara Fromin, Eve, Ella, Isabella.

And one last do: Spring is all about dresses and prints. Bright colors – yellow is a must. – Alicia George.
See a pattern emerging? Denim (outside the acid, stone and other artificial washes, that is). Polo. Yellow.
My affinity for denim and polos has been documented above, and I need to add that I have a pair of yellow – blindly yellow – running shoes. I’m set for a Beau Brummell of a spring, huh?

Just one more thing …
There’s a 74% chance that a man who isn’t wearing socks isn’t wearing underwear, either. – Esquire Magazine.
Patently untrue – 100% of the time I wear one or the other.

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